They say jack of all is master in none, what if you aim to master in being jack of all ? They say we cant ride in two vehicles at once, but two or more vehicles can definitely have one owner. Tough, but not impossible. Might have felt hopeless in times, but have not stopped living. Short time for so many dreams, but life has not stopped yet and time is still running. Things did not work well, does not matter, will find some other way. Failure in life, definitely seen many of times, but, will always find something to keep myself motivated.
Well this is my 1st blog and I started it with few motivating lines for my life. I will be revealing a little bits of dark sides of my life which I kept with my self for so long, that it was really difficult for me to come out of it. But finally, I am done with it (i guess). Coming straight to the point; I do not want people to know about my failure, but today I am writing it publicly because I do not want to run away from it any more. 2014 is definitely working for me as a healing. I might have given up on something, but today, I am happy, alive and living.Much more motivated on whatever I am doing and positive about my future.
In times I was scared, that people will think these thing as a publicity stunt or they will make fun of it, so I did not wanted to express it. But the thing is, we should talk about it and share it because not sharing it will cause "Depression". And I tell you, feelings in those days were so worst. Not valuing my self was the worst thing I did to my self. But now that I'v talked to so many people, its not only me who've felt so worst. There are many who felt exactly like me and they were in same condition just like me. Thanks to the technology, my parents, my 1st counselor and all my near and dear ones who tried so hard to pour out all my thoughts.
So, when I see someone frustrated, I want to listen to them ,because I know how it feels & I recommend them to share. Some will laugh on it ,some will bitch about it, some will show sympathy which we definitely do not want and very few will listen to us. But in the end we will learn to face it and soon find the solution to it. But when we do not talk about it, we are stuck in it, and for how long?? We'v got so many dreams, so many things to do and so many things we can still try and Do it perfect. We cannot stop and get stuck in One thing that is troubling us.
They say try until you die. What? Do you want us To die for that One thing that did not work well, Without trying the thing that Might work well !! If you want to try, go ahead and try but if it does not work out well, let go of it or take a break with it and try something else. If that also doesn't work out try something else again or change your way of accomplishing it. Every thing changes, life, universe, stars, sun, everything so changing is not a bad thing its a good thing. It means we are growing. We should not worry when someone says "you've changed a lot". We should be happy that we changed for our good. The important thing is we should be aware of the change.
That statement, "Try until you die", I think is the worst statement. I am sorry, but I think that motivates some ignorant people to suicide. We hear so many such suicidal cases and during such condition, I tell you sometimes suicide do seems a solution but that's not the right thing. Life is a wonderful gift, if we live we have some options open; if we die, all the options are closed. If we live we might find a door, if we die we will not find it, which might be right behind you. May be we just need to turn back once. May be we need to take a U-turn, look back into life to find that hidden door and go through that door.. or may be some other options but die?. No not at all.
Life is a cycle. A death of one person can be considered as an end to a life or can also be considered as a start to another new life, well I do believe in re-birth; until and unless you become a Buddha I believe we will have to be born again. And its all about how we view it, what we view it, an end or a start. However, we've not been that enlightened to see our past life nor our future life, so why take chances. Past is Gone, Future is Unpredictable so lets live in present and make changes according to its need. Ah.... it took me so long to think so wise.. :( Never mind, later is better then never :D. Well most of them are copied but I really am inspired from them :D and to tell you ,when depressed even after knowing these things, I could not use them positively; my negativity was just too strong; it was only then when I started sharing my feelings that I felt the change. And to keep it constant, I had to share and share, when I stopped, again the negativity would increase.
At first, sharing was also very very difficult. So, I Started with a diary and I gave my near and dear ones to read them. I started with my parents and then slowly I started talking about it with every one and today I am here writing it publicly. I still doubt about few of my friends reaction but still I want to share because it will help me and somebody else like me. I think I am doing good thing so why say no for good thing if this can be help. Do correct me if I am wrong.
Coming back, we were not instructed that we are meant to be this and that . We do not know!! Life does not have a list of do's and don't or a manual. We will know about our pro's and con's in times and also how to deal with it in times. We might not be able to find out what we can do in 1st attempt but we will find out one day if we keep on living. But if we are stuck in one thing we will not be able to find out what other things we can do. Who knows we are multi talented in other stuff except for this. I think its wiser to work on your plus points than to work on something you are not meant to be and get depressed. Yes, work on your weak points to polish yourself but only then, when you are done working on your plus points. If we can be happy from the powerful plus points why spoil our life for some stupid weak points. But again, that is my view to motivate my self for my situation. You might have a different situation, so next suggestion I can give is read a lot of positive and motivating lines they will help you analyse your situation. I do a lot of self analysis because I am very much conscious about my image. I do not want to hurt people and I do not want to be bad girl ; positively that is good negatively we cant be sweet to all & we cannot be right every time. Never mind. I am happy being the good girl and would accept any suggestion to improvise my self.
However, It really took me a lot of time to get the confidence to put my view the right way and express myself. I could not express what I wanted, when I was feeling Depressed. I knew what was going wrong, or may be I did not but I could not put it the right way or express how I was feeling ; and because of that I wasted a lot of time. But being positive, I'l not call it a complete waste because in that process, I'v learnt to motivate myself, smile in hard situations and what I studied are always gonna be a plus point for me. What I learnt is never a waste, what I Could not is something I always focused on and got depressed in past and may be it will pinch me in my future. Whatsoever, lets give it a try to something else . Who knows i'd do much better here. May be I never realized this was my plus point and I could do better here. When I see my mates doing good in what I could not, its frustrating! So I did not wanted to speak to my colleagues, or even face them either. But why compare myself with others. All of us are different. I am not here to to brag about myself but I bet I have something different that everybody else doesn't have. If you think I've bragged about my self a lot already, please tolerate me for this one. I usually don't brag a lot but, this is how i motivate myself. One thing, that I have learnt, is; one should respect yourself and value yourself to motivate yourself. Have a little bit of ego, not too much but a little bit, to love yourself and to not to let yourself down and to motivate yourself :D
And not every one can dare to talk about their failure, at least not when they are still in the troubled phase or when they have not established them selves in any field. But I want to, not because I am confident about my future, to tell the truth I am still too much confused about what next, I just know I will do every thing to be independent but not a dependent house wife, not at all.
After a failure, I think its obvious that we do not dare to take the risk, it is difficult to take the next step. But still I am talking about it, because its not only me who has gone through this kind of situation. Many has gone and many mite have to face it.. I hope u wont have to but failures are part of life. The biggest success is that we are not giving up on it and still facing it.. and living it. Some will learn to deal with it, some will learn to ignore it and somebody like me might get stuck with it and they must know, the best way out, is to face it, share it, live it and get stronger. We will not always have a win win situation, we will have to face failure too and in that day we will have to learn to motivate our self and help our self because "Man is his best friend and worst enemy".
Thank you so much for bearing me this long. Any kind of suggestions, ideas and feed backs are always welcomed :D. Thank you!
